So I came here in April and by June I am ready to come home! I am feeling so forgotten and homesick! I miss my dogs and children running around chaos being created through the house. I miss the smells of St. George the red mountains of dirt. The Hot hot weather. I want to go swimming, talk to my friends there be with my family. Most of all I want to feel that need of being needed. Of being the one people I loved counted on for almost everything. I want to hear the kids say my name and run to me after being gone for a little while. The dogs barking and whining glad that their mom is home. Laughing with Lisa over something silly stupid that happened. Calling Stephanie to see how everything is going and if I needed to get anything for her. Hearing from Jay where he is when he was coming home and what he wants to do. I loved it all and being on my own was becoming very lonely.
The other part was the countdown for my sisters wedding. It was so close and I was going to miss one of the biggest parts of my baby sisters life! It hurt me to the core that I wasn't going to be there for it! After crying almost every night and sometimes during the day from this lonely ache I decided I had enough! I went to Dan's home where I told him I wanted to go home immediately. That I needed to be with my family and center myself once more, but I promised him I would come back. I just needed a week with my family, my heart and soul needed to be with them. Whats not better or happier then a beautiful wedding to see all of your family? I called my mom. She understood why I wanted to come home, but was afraid that if I came back I would not return to Japan. I told her I was only packing a carry on bag and leaving all of the rest behind so I had to return. Plus I had a contract and I was not going to break it. I am not a person who breaks promises if I can help it. I know that the schools are going to panic because of past ALT's disappearing with no word, but I couldn't think about that now. I would face the consequences after I came back. I would come back. Dan was kind and comforted me as I sat bawling on his couch for the 3rd night he was again at my side helping me through my crazy ache. He helped me get a plane ticket and formed a plan for me the next day so that I could be on the next flight asap.
The next morning I woke with a small headache like the past week. I shrugged it off got dressed and met Dan at the door. We were going to the B.O.E so I could explain and get the time off. When we got there I was quiet and kept my head down. I was trying hard not to cry and cause them to panic. They want nothing more than to keep me happy so I stay. This unexpected trip back home would be a shock to them. But I need it!!! Finally we meet with the man who gave me a contract. Dan explains the situation, shock then concern crosses his face. He asks, will you come back. I answer as confident as I could. "Yes I will come back. I just need to go home for a little bit." He nods, I explain part of it was for my sisters wedding. I was going to surprise her by being there. This brings a smile to his face and he tells me to congratulate her on her new happiness. We leave there I feel a slow calm set in. I AM GOING HOME!
Then I refocus, I need to pack, clean the house, make sure Dan has the key. When I get to my hometown I must be happy and focus on Rachelle. It is her day! I will spend sometime with a friend who always makes me laugh search for a dress and then travel with my mom down to St. George to pack more of my things from my old home then fly back to Japan. I CAN DO THIS!
Everything set Dan takes me to the airport gives me a hug and says "Please come back!" I tell him I will and say "See you in a week!" Then go to board the first flight of my trip home. That week flew by with tears of joy and some of pain but it was what I needed and I felt whole again. I also missed being in Japan and by the end of the week, I was ready to go back.
Some days I still get homesick. Especially when I don't hear from my family and friends. Sometimes I still feel forgotten. But I know we are all busy and there is a huge time zone difference. I love you all! Thank you for being my rock when I feel weak. Without you I could not imagine doing this!
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Schools...
I love my schools and the students. Although one school is a little frustrating and stressful, thanks to a brilliant and amazing mentor there Catherine who has become a good friend, I have been able to adjust smoothly with the teachers and they know that I will do whatever I can do help the students in whatever they need. The hardest part is trying to communicate and talk about the lessons that are needing planning since not all of my teachers can speak or understand English very well. This sometimes has proven a challenge but as most challenges it has big rewards. The schools here are stunning! They have air conditioners but do not run them while school is in session, not entirely sure of the reasoning behind it but they don`t use it. They use electric fans and open windows. So some days I feel very sticky with sweat. My students too feel the heat. As summer approaches it continues to get hotter and no amount of water I drink keeps the thirst away for long. The grade levels are divided by floors in the building with the older students being at the top. Most schools have 4 floors. Let me tell you I feel like instead of going down to meet Hades I am going up to meet him. Cause as science has told us heat rises and I teach in the upper parts of the schools a lot more then the lower half. Again no air conditioner....
Teaching is a BLAST! The students are what we call energetic, fun, and excited (Most days) to learn English and play games with me. In Japan they refer to it as genky. I love that word Genky. It is just a happy word. But whenever I enter a classroom I am greeted by "HELLO AIMEE SENSEI!!!!" Some students look for my green color on me, others ask for stickers, and all of them quickly sit so we can start. While they do have a higher and deeper respect for the teachers and they do listen and follow instructions without question (As long as they understand). They are still children, and just like all children in school you have good and bad days, when I storm is approaching they are more energetic and talkative so teaching becomes difficult. Some students will fall asleep some play in the desks. The typical things we find in the classrooms back in good ol` USA.
The other part I love about Japanese schools is the faculty room. While teachers have a desk in the classroom the faculty room is set up as we would with students. Each teacher has a desk and all the desks are set up in groups so that the teachers can talk and share with each other. I love this open flow of sharing lessons and even when they have a problem with a student. Many schools in the US are starting this "Open door policy" but to have it so open in the staff room is wonderful.
Eating is done in the classroom with the teacher. There is no school lunch room. The lunch is prepared then put onto rolling carts and set outside the classroom. It is then set up and served by the students. No one starts eating until everyone has food. They also eat everything given to them, no left overs no being picky. You eat what is given and are grateful for it. This is the hardest part for me as I do not like tomatoes, mushrooms and some fish. But I have learned that if I see something right away before I start eating that I do not want I can try to give it to another student. Most of the time the students see this as a reward and are happy to accept it. However, if you leave any food on the plate and do not eat it you are considered rude. I have only done this once. I will not eat mushroom! Well I won`t eat most mushrooms....there is one called enekeida or something like that. It is a long white mushroom that is chopped into small thin slices and placed in soup. That I can handle.
After lunch the students have a period where they clean the school. This includes vacuuming hand and knee scrubbing/ buffing floors, dusting, cleaning windows, watering plants, etc. Amazingly is you see them all smiling and happy to be taking care of their school. It really is very nice and provides teachers time to do some paperwork or meet with each other or the principal (Kocho sensei) Students don`t get out of school until 4. Then they have study clubs, or sports clubs, or other school things to do. At about 6 is when you may finally see them out playing with friends, sometimes earlier but most of the time you see the students heading home from a school activity still in their uniform. When they get home they do more homework and studies and family things whatever that may be. If there is one thing I have learned is that the Japanese people are very hard working and all about community and helping one another. It is refreshing and eye opening.
I usually head home at 4 where I shower, watch shows, eat, and prepare for the next day. I feel lazy compared to my students but then again, I have been lucky in my life and how I was able to play after school, did not have hours of studying, and was not required to be part of a club. If I was part of a club it was a choice. We are a spoiled and lucky bunch living in the US.
Teaching is a BLAST! The students are what we call energetic, fun, and excited (Most days) to learn English and play games with me. In Japan they refer to it as genky. I love that word Genky. It is just a happy word. But whenever I enter a classroom I am greeted by "HELLO AIMEE SENSEI!!!!" Some students look for my green color on me, others ask for stickers, and all of them quickly sit so we can start. While they do have a higher and deeper respect for the teachers and they do listen and follow instructions without question (As long as they understand). They are still children, and just like all children in school you have good and bad days, when I storm is approaching they are more energetic and talkative so teaching becomes difficult. Some students will fall asleep some play in the desks. The typical things we find in the classrooms back in good ol` USA.
The other part I love about Japanese schools is the faculty room. While teachers have a desk in the classroom the faculty room is set up as we would with students. Each teacher has a desk and all the desks are set up in groups so that the teachers can talk and share with each other. I love this open flow of sharing lessons and even when they have a problem with a student. Many schools in the US are starting this "Open door policy" but to have it so open in the staff room is wonderful.
Eating is done in the classroom with the teacher. There is no school lunch room. The lunch is prepared then put onto rolling carts and set outside the classroom. It is then set up and served by the students. No one starts eating until everyone has food. They also eat everything given to them, no left overs no being picky. You eat what is given and are grateful for it. This is the hardest part for me as I do not like tomatoes, mushrooms and some fish. But I have learned that if I see something right away before I start eating that I do not want I can try to give it to another student. Most of the time the students see this as a reward and are happy to accept it. However, if you leave any food on the plate and do not eat it you are considered rude. I have only done this once. I will not eat mushroom! Well I won`t eat most mushrooms....there is one called enekeida or something like that. It is a long white mushroom that is chopped into small thin slices and placed in soup. That I can handle.
After lunch the students have a period where they clean the school. This includes vacuuming hand and knee scrubbing/ buffing floors, dusting, cleaning windows, watering plants, etc. Amazingly is you see them all smiling and happy to be taking care of their school. It really is very nice and provides teachers time to do some paperwork or meet with each other or the principal (Kocho sensei) Students don`t get out of school until 4. Then they have study clubs, or sports clubs, or other school things to do. At about 6 is when you may finally see them out playing with friends, sometimes earlier but most of the time you see the students heading home from a school activity still in their uniform. When they get home they do more homework and studies and family things whatever that may be. If there is one thing I have learned is that the Japanese people are very hard working and all about community and helping one another. It is refreshing and eye opening.
I usually head home at 4 where I shower, watch shows, eat, and prepare for the next day. I feel lazy compared to my students but then again, I have been lucky in my life and how I was able to play after school, did not have hours of studying, and was not required to be part of a club. If I was part of a club it was a choice. We are a spoiled and lucky bunch living in the US.
Monday, September 9, 2013
The first drive
Being in Japan has had its challenges and its blessings. I love it here but some days I despise it. I know those who are reading this are thinking, "Wait! What is she doing? Are we not continuing the story?" The answer yes we will. For a little while I had to take a break when I did not want to because of recent medical events which I will tell soon. The problem with telling this story is that I have to get you up to date but with each week that passes I am getting farther behind. So I need to do what is done in t.v. series and make it spread out a bit. Which is possible because we have hit the week when I start working so now I can tell you the big stand out points and little events that stood out. I don`t need to give a play by play like I first did getting off the plane. As you read my blogs please feel free to comment. I want feedback so I can make my writing stronger. As many know one day I hope to publish a story so this I am hoping will help my creativity flow and "get the juices pumping." Now to continue...
The knock at my door comes again... I recognize it! I get up from my bed out my now empty bowl in the sink and answer the door. " Hey Dan, what`s up?" Dan comes in and takes off his shoes at the door, "Well I think its time you start driving since you start work on your own tomorrow and will need a way to get there." I smile, "Ya that would be a good idea since my first day is Kuze which is up in the mountains. It would be a long walk." We talk about the days events and how much I remember (Not very much just general directions) Dan tells me that I just need to watch the signs and I will be able to get to my first school. However, my brain is more focused on having to drive a car on the opposite side of the road. A road that is super small and sometimes only possible for one car to pass through at a time. Dan and I sit at the table and he tells me he has made a phone call to the insurance man and the Shaakan (registration and licensing) guy. The insurance guy will be there in about 20 minutes. The other will come by tomorrow and trade cars to get my car all set for the road. (Inspections). When the licensing guys arrives we talk about what kind of coverage I want and I sign some papers. Then he gives me his card with his number on it. I place this with the rest of my car paperwork and go out and place all of the paperwork inside the glove box. Then I come back in and say goodbye to him.
Then knowing all things would be taken care of Dan handed me the keys, "Let`s go for a drive." I warily grab the keys. A little excited but scared as well. I take a deep breath as I walk out to my black subaru. I climb in, so far so good. I didn`t get in on the wrong side. It takes me a minute to adjust to where the key goes in, blinkers, wipers, and how to put the car into drive is all opposite from what I am traditionally use to driving. I also have to get use to the cars length and width. I am use to a jeep so this is a little different. ;) We start driving on out to the main road. Route 303 is the big road I will be using. With no cars around me I feel a little more comfortable about getting use tho the car and how it handles. The gas, breaks, blinkers, wipers, lights... I am even driving on the correct side of the road and turning the correct way! Starting to feel confident now I trek out. Dan is also please with how well I am doing. We both were getting too confident too soon. The road starts getting crowded with cars and people. Then all the sudden I gasp, Dan cries, "UH Aimee.." then BAM! Clunk clunk clunk.... I smacked a mirror with my mirror of a parked car. I swear, and ask the question I already know the answer to. "Should I pull over?" Dan looks back, "I don`t think they noticed, but yes pull over and lets make sure all is alright." I stop the car turn on my hazards and slowly take a breath then get out of the car. Shaking in my knees we approach the car I hit. The plastic of the mirror had come clean off but the ladies car was already having problems and was currently being looked at. Dan checked to make sure all was OK. The man fixing her car said that the mirror should be fine and he could put the plastic back on no problem. (Phew close call!) We walk back to the car. I am holding back tears of disappointment and shock. That could have been a lot worse. I HATE THESE SMALL ROADS! I am mad at myself and embarrassed having been driving for 5 minutes and having an accident!
Dan asks if I am OK to drive. I tell him I am and I need to or I won`t want to. This seems to give him confidence in me. I ask for one minute as I gather my thoughts away from what happened and focus back on the road. Then I drive. The roads may be small but the drive is truly beautiful. I begin to fall in love with the area around me all over again. I just wish I could have my family and loved ones here with me to enjoy this! Everywhere I turn I act like a child soaking in as much information as I can. By the time we get home,( I had driven the route of my school for the next day) I am exhausted and ready for sleep. Dan wishes me luck and I close my door turn off the lights and climb into bed. Lights out.
The knock at my door comes again... I recognize it! I get up from my bed out my now empty bowl in the sink and answer the door. " Hey Dan, what`s up?" Dan comes in and takes off his shoes at the door, "Well I think its time you start driving since you start work on your own tomorrow and will need a way to get there." I smile, "Ya that would be a good idea since my first day is Kuze which is up in the mountains. It would be a long walk." We talk about the days events and how much I remember (Not very much just general directions) Dan tells me that I just need to watch the signs and I will be able to get to my first school. However, my brain is more focused on having to drive a car on the opposite side of the road. A road that is super small and sometimes only possible for one car to pass through at a time. Dan and I sit at the table and he tells me he has made a phone call to the insurance man and the Shaakan (registration and licensing) guy. The insurance guy will be there in about 20 minutes. The other will come by tomorrow and trade cars to get my car all set for the road. (Inspections). When the licensing guys arrives we talk about what kind of coverage I want and I sign some papers. Then he gives me his card with his number on it. I place this with the rest of my car paperwork and go out and place all of the paperwork inside the glove box. Then I come back in and say goodbye to him.
Then knowing all things would be taken care of Dan handed me the keys, "Let`s go for a drive." I warily grab the keys. A little excited but scared as well. I take a deep breath as I walk out to my black subaru. I climb in, so far so good. I didn`t get in on the wrong side. It takes me a minute to adjust to where the key goes in, blinkers, wipers, and how to put the car into drive is all opposite from what I am traditionally use to driving. I also have to get use to the cars length and width. I am use to a jeep so this is a little different. ;) We start driving on out to the main road. Route 303 is the big road I will be using. With no cars around me I feel a little more comfortable about getting use tho the car and how it handles. The gas, breaks, blinkers, wipers, lights... I am even driving on the correct side of the road and turning the correct way! Starting to feel confident now I trek out. Dan is also please with how well I am doing. We both were getting too confident too soon. The road starts getting crowded with cars and people. Then all the sudden I gasp, Dan cries, "UH Aimee.." then BAM! Clunk clunk clunk.... I smacked a mirror with my mirror of a parked car. I swear, and ask the question I already know the answer to. "Should I pull over?" Dan looks back, "I don`t think they noticed, but yes pull over and lets make sure all is alright." I stop the car turn on my hazards and slowly take a breath then get out of the car. Shaking in my knees we approach the car I hit. The plastic of the mirror had come clean off but the ladies car was already having problems and was currently being looked at. Dan checked to make sure all was OK. The man fixing her car said that the mirror should be fine and he could put the plastic back on no problem. (Phew close call!) We walk back to the car. I am holding back tears of disappointment and shock. That could have been a lot worse. I HATE THESE SMALL ROADS! I am mad at myself and embarrassed having been driving for 5 minutes and having an accident!
Dan asks if I am OK to drive. I tell him I am and I need to or I won`t want to. This seems to give him confidence in me. I ask for one minute as I gather my thoughts away from what happened and focus back on the road. Then I drive. The roads may be small but the drive is truly beautiful. I begin to fall in love with the area around me all over again. I just wish I could have my family and loved ones here with me to enjoy this! Everywhere I turn I act like a child soaking in as much information as I can. By the time we get home,( I had driven the route of my school for the next day) I am exhausted and ready for sleep. Dan wishes me luck and I close my door turn off the lights and climb into bed. Lights out.
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